Friends

Sometimes it's weird because I have friends I talk to all the time. Some friends I only talk to through e-mail. Some friends I talk to every once in a while over the phone. Other friends, I see all the time. Then, there are friends that I would consider some of my best and we go weeks where we don't see each other or talk and then we go weeks where we see each other 3 or 4 times in the same week. I don't mind not seeing friends but I don't like going long periods without talking. It makes me feel weird. So, when I haven't seen or talked to a friend in a few weeks, those first initial moments are a little weird. It's almost like you have to remember what's happened in the last couple of weeks and pick some key moments that are worth talking about. If you talk often, then you can talk about even the little stuff. I have one friend, I would probably consider the best I've ever had. We're that way. We go weeks where we don't talk, not because one is mad at the other, just because life is busy. When we get together it's like the first few minutes are a little awkward and then we start talking and an hour later we still have more to say. It's great having friends like that. If I go too long without talking to her, though...I have to make up an excuse to call just so we can catch up. I have the fear that some day that friend won't be nearby anymore and we'll have to learn a new way to communicate. It's easy now to just run over to her house or run into each other at the grocery store. But, if she ever moves away we'll both have to adapt to talking on the phone. Although, I'd have to say I do pretty good at communicating via e-mail. We'll see when the time comes although I'm not looking forward to that day. It seems like I've had good or even great friends in my past and with time, they all have disappeared in one way or another. I'm glad I have a husband and more importantly, a heavenly Father, I can always talk to and he'll never go away. That doesn't mean I don't like my girl time, though.

What's Ahead

Next week, Chris has the whole week off work. We have some friends coming in from KY and OH. We're very excited to have them around and hope we can be entertaining enough. It's hard to plan activities for young and old alike that all will enjoy. I think the old people want to sit around for 5 days. The young people don't mind a little of that, but would probably enjoy a little more activity. We'll see what we can get them to do. I'm looking forward to having my husband around for a week but if we don't come up with activities he'll end up working because he can't sit still.

This will be Eli's first July 4th. We're excited to see how he will respond to fireworks. Dylan remembers playing with chicken fireworks last year and how they pooped out different colors. That's what he says he remembers anyway.

I better get moving so Dylan and Eli can have a little time outside before the rain moves in for the day. Have a great weekend!

Glad It's Over

Our Relay for Life was a success. We met and exceeded our financial goal. Our disappointment came when we thought we would be the only team selling smores for the evening but ended up being one of three or one of four. We were the only team allowing you to roast your own marshmallows, but either way it didn't go over as big as we had hoped. Several people joked that we should sell time by our fire because as the night went on, the weather got cooler, and the dew fell making you cold and wet.

I'm going to learn more about the American Cancer Society. This year we did the Relay kind of out of obligation to our family. However, I don't have a problem working hard for a charity and having fun at it. I'm going to find out how the money is spent and I'll get back with you on whether it is a worthy cause.

There were lots of things to do all night long. They had karaoke, volleyball tournaments, tricycle races, balloon toss, egg toss, and lots more. Plus, there was plenty of time to just sit and visit with people that you maybe don't have that opportunity with at other times.

I'm glad it's over just because I felt like I was worrying over it too much, but I did enjoy the evening and I especially enjoyed just hanging out not having to worry about where my kids were or if they were ok. My Dad and Mom took great care of them and the boys had fun.

Big Night!

Tonight is the big night. We have our Relay for Life. I hope to make it all night. That means I will have no sleep or maybe just small winks of sleep until tomorrow morning when we get home around 8:00a.m. I will be so tired. I am thankful my Mom and Dad are willing to keep my boys tonight and take them tomorrow for several hours so I can catch a few winks more.

We're selling s'mores at our tent for $1 each and you get to roast your own marshmallow. We'll be at the Republic Middle School track for any of those who might be interestd in a great dessert or just some fun fellowship. We'll be there all night, literally.

Our team reached its financial goal thanks to many of you. We're very excited about that and everything we make tonight on our silent auction basket and s'mores will be extra. Our silent auction basket should be pretty cool. We have Silver Dollar City tickets, Branson Tracks free ride tickets, and lots of candy, popcorn, and soda. Yes, I said Soda. That's what I call it. Some call it pop. Sometimes when I'm trying to be funny I call it soda pop. That's funny!

Today, I told Dylan I would love to go ride on a cloud some day and he told me I couldn't because they don't have seats. Isn't it funny how 3-year olds think. He's going to have a great time tonight because he gets to run in the biggest circles. If you know Dylan, you know he LOVES to run in circles.

Kids Are Great

I love my boys. Dylan and Eli crack me up daily. Dylan has this beautiful smile and his big blue eyes just shine. He's growing up so fast and he comes up with new things every day. I think, "Where did he get that?" It's so funny to hear him talk to Eli. He says so many of the things we say. He's not just a direct reflection of us, like a mirror, he repeats us. Sometimes, he doesn't even know what he's saying. He loves to ride his tricycle and play in the dirt. His favorite thing to do when we go down to the baseball field is to kick the dirt. He wants to go on a walk all the time which really means ride our bikes and he either wants to go to the park to play on the playground or to the recreation center where he can run in big circles in their gymnasium. He is always asking for cold water and I think that's great. It's summer time and water is a very refreshing, hydrating solution.

Eli is almost a year old. He also has a beautiful smile but he still only has 3 teeth so I'm sure it will only get better. His big blue eyes stick out and swallow you in. He loves to climb everything. We were recently at a friend's shop. Eli had a yucky diaper, so I being the nice friend, decided to take it out back to the dumpster rather than put it in their indoor trash can. I thought my husband would naturally watch Eli but he didn't feel the need so he went off to the restroom. Our friend was taking care of a client. When I got back inside, Eli was 3 steps up on a 6-foot ladder with his foot ready to climb to the 4th step. I ran toward him and all I could see was this huge smile on his face. I stopped behind him to make sure he wouldnt' fall and then waited for Chris to return. After laughing at Eli together, I did have to scold my husband but then we both laughed again because it was just a funny situation. That's Eli! He climbs step-stools all the time. If you can't find him in the house, check Dylan's bed because there is a step-stool in there for him to climb. If he's not there, check the bathroom. There's a step-stool in there and he loves to climb it so he can look at himself in the mirror. If you're outside he is one of two places when he disappears. He's either climbing the steps or getting into the little battery powered car we have. He loves it, also! He's so strong, too. I am, however, ready for him to walk. I'd like him to start walking soon so he can get more coordinated for when we go on vacation. I think he'll be able to enjoy more if he can walk. Plus, if he's still only crawling then I'll have to keep him in pants most of the time to protect his knees and I'd just rather he be able to enjoy shorts weather in California.

All In!

When I commit to something, no matter what else happens, I totally commit to it. I joined a Relay For Life team and I'm not real great at raising money. Most fundraisers, I'd rather just give my own money and move on rather than inconvenience someone else. In this case, I don't have $400 to give. Someone else committed me to that dollar figure and I will try to do my part. Well, my husband came up with $300 of it and then we did a garage sale at our house. With everyone's stuff our total came to be $305 plus then we auctioned off the stuff that didn't sell and made an extra $48. So, I guess I feel like I got close. But, I still want to contribute to make sure our team reaches its financial goal of $3,000. I already told you about the phone calls I was making. Well, I haven't gotten any more cash donations. I did, however, score some show tickets for Branson, get a $25 gift card from Murfin's Market in Willard which I spent on supplies for at least 100 s'mores to sell the night of the Relay, and I got free ride passes at Branson Tracks to put in our silent auction basket. So, if our silent auction goes well and we have everything in there that we're supposed to, our basket will be valued at $200 or more. I know I didn't do it all but I contributed. I will also contribute some of my own money, yes. I will buy some popcorn and peanuts and soda pop for the basket and maybe that will help a little. Plus, when it gets right down to it, I'm hoping we'll sell tons of s'mores. My mind has been consumed with this lately and I'm so ready to get it over so I can concentrate on something else.

We have family friends coming in at the first of July. I'm already starting to work with my sisters-in-law and mom to come up with activites and menu. I've been coordinating and communicating with all parts of the team here and the visiting crew. It's been fun and in a few days I can concentrate completely on it. I'm ALL IN!

With that thought in mind, shouldn't we, as Christians, be ALL IN? Wow! What a thought? We should love God with our whole heart and want to live our lives to the fullest extent where everyone around us knows we are Christians and we represent God's army.

In your life, what are you ALL IN about?

People Not to Do Business With

So, I was calling around looking for some show ticket donations for the Branson area. I called a few local businesses and I honestly don't mind them saying they aren't interested, can't afford it, or already helping someone. I don't mind being told No at all. What I don't like is when people say, "No Way" or they just plain old hang up on you. How rude and unprofessional?! I called the Branson Hotline 417-823-3064. They were one of those extremely rude companies. I called Branson Central Reservations 417-334-4991 and she's the one who actually hung up on me. I wanted to call back and say, "Sorry, we must have been disconnected", but I decided to be the bigger person. I had one guy at "Branson Show Tickets" 417-336-5925 say he was on the other line and he would call me right back. I used a different phone line so he could do that and guess what...he never called me back. He could have just said he wasn't interested or couldn't at this time. I am a very understanding person. I had several people direct me to someone else and then that person directed me to someone else. I think to some it was a game and some they honestly didn't know what to do. I'll even take that better than a business hanging up on me. That's just immature. So, I named the businesses and gave you their phone numbers. Don't do business with them.

As for good companies, I got turned down by several. Price Cutter, Lacey, was extremely cordial. She said they had lots of donation requests and could only take so many. She also said they were corporate sponsors for Relay For Life and appreciated what I was doing. I like those kind of No's. Wal-mart managers I spoke with were very nice and Dixie Stampede was above par. They could not have been nicer.

I've decided that I'm big on reviews. I want to know what other people think about a product or a company. It really helps me decide what to buy and where. So, from now on, those who impress me or don't will get a review. You'll know how I really feel.

Happy Anniversary!

Happy Anniversary to my beloved husband of 9 years. I love you!

Right Between the Eyes

I was sent a devotion today. I enjoy receiving them from someone else. It says to me that "this devotion meant something to them and made them think of me or my family". So, with that I give you the devotion that was sent to me.

Deep Grief
By Lysa TerKeurst

Psalms 30:11 Thou hast turned for me my mourning into dancing: thou hast put off my sackcloth, and girded me with gladness;

Sometimes when we lose things it causes a temporary panic that rises and falls in a mini-tidal wave fashion. Like earlier this year when I lost my camera with all our ski vacation pictures on it. The panic escalated, crested with some hand wringing and mind racing, and then slowly ebbed away.

But sometimes a loss cuts into your heart so viciously that it forever redefines who you are and how you think. It’s what I call “deep grief.” The kind that strains against everything you've ever believed. So much so you wonder how the promises that seemed so real on those thin Bible pages yesterday, could possibly stand up under the weight of enormous sadness today.

I once stood at the side of a casket too small to accept. Pink roses draped everywhere. And I watched my mom as she lay across the casket, refusing to let go. How could she let go? Part of her heart laid within, so quiet and so still.

I stood paralyzed. Just days ago we were doing everyday things and assuming that all of our lives stretched before us in spans of many, many years. And then suddenly it all stopped. In the flurry of funeral plans and memorial services we all operated on automatic. People were everywhere. Soft chatter filled in the gaps that our stunned silence could not. And enough food was brought in to feed the whole neighborhood.

But eventually people went back to their own lives. The soft chatter dissipated. The food stopped coming. And we were forced to carry on. Only we had deep grief wrapped about us that made our throats feel strangled and our feet stuck in mud.

I remember I tried to go to McDonalds to order a happy meal. But I couldn't. I sat in the drive-through with the speaker spouting words at me I couldn't process. She kept asking if she could take my order.

Yeah, I had an order. Take away my bloodshot eyes. Take away my desire to hurt the doctors that couldn't save my sister. Take away my anger toward God. And then take away my guilt for being the one that lived. I'll take all that with no onions and extra ketchup, please.

I drove away sobbing. How dare they offer happy meals. No one should be happy today. Or tomorrow. Or next year.

This is the reality of deep grief. Even when you love God and believe in His promises. Even when you know without a doubt that you will see your loved one again. Even when you know hope is still there.

It takes time.

It takes wading through an ocean of tears.

It takes finding a possession of your loved one that you thought was lost, and realizing God did that just to comfort you. It takes discovering one day that the sun still shines. It takes being caught off-guard when you catch yourself smiling… only to realize it's okay.

It takes prayer. It takes making the decision to stop asking for answers and start asking for perspective. It takes telling people to please not avoid saying her name - you want to hear it, over and over again.

Then one day you take off the blanket of deep grief. You fold it neatly and tuck it away. You no longer hate it or resist it. For underneath it, wondrous things have happened. Things that could have only come about when Divine hope intersected with a broken world.

And finally you can see years stretching before you once again. You look up, blow a kiss, wipe a tear and find it's still possible to dance. In light of their own recent loss, may we all keep the family of Steven Curtis and Marybeth Chapman in our prayers for all the time it will take them to shed their deep grief and discover their dance again.

Dear Lord, Thank you for assuring us that your principles and promises hold true even when life seems to betray us. We praise You that Your love reaches to any depth we find ourselves in. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Application Steps:
Is there someone in your life who is grieving right now? Commit to reaching out to them this week.

Reflections:
Death is a reality of life. So, how can you live more intentionally each day with those you love?

Power Verse:
2 Corinthians 1:2-4, “Grace be to you and peace from God our Father, and from the Lord Jesus Christ. Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort; Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God.” (NIV)

Wow, so that hit me right between the eyes. And, it came at a time where I could accept it. "Thank you, Lord, for bringing people into my life that make me think."