Today I Choose

I'm just going to vent my frustration here because my husband isn't having a great day either so he doesn't need to have more added drama. I wake up this morning to Eli crying and he won't go back to bed so, yes, I do the lazy Mom thing and stuff him into bed with me. I just about fall back asleep when I realize I really need to be up showering and getting ready for my super busy day that includes payroll. I'm running behind already and it isn't even 8:00. I get my stuff organized and get ready to log in to start payroll and the Internet at my place of business is down. Great! So, I can't remote in and that means one thing, pack up your stuff and head to the office. But, wait, if the Internet is down, then I still can't connect to Commerce to do direct deposit so I'm going to have to do hand-written checks, anyway. Uggghhhh! If I just have to write the checks, anyway, then it isn't crucial that I get the information at any certain time. It's only direct deposit that has to be done before 6pm tonight. I move on to Job #2 and have problems there, as well. Things won't balance, transactions are missing, I'm confused about new items. Ugggghhh! Did I already say that? I finally get things figured out through several phone calls (and I rarely ever place a call to my boss there - I just do my job and we talk through e-mail if at all). As soon as I complete that, the Internet starts working again so I'm back to working on payroll. I get everything printed and I'm rolling along and I have troubles logging in. I finally get logged in after several tries and then low and behold there is an error message when I'm doing direct deposit. I log out and log back in like a good customer before calling. Same error message. I try to do a fund transfer instead thinking I'll just do the necessary and try again later...error message! Uggghhhh, I am so frustrated. The kids are arguing in the background. The trains are going round and round on the track but no one is playing with them. And, I'm sure there was something else annoying going on but I don't know what it was. I finally decide to call tech support and he says, "Well, you can't use Google Chrome...your error message is because you aren't logged in to Internet Explorer". What? Are you serious? I use Chrome every week and now after 6 months of doing direct deposit, it's going to give me an error message. Is this a test? I'm not passing. My stomach is full of anxiety. I haven't really eaten more than a snack of shredded wheat today (and that's not a filling snack, mind you). My head is starting to ache. My muscles are tense. I keep telling myself, it's Friday. The day is going to get better. I log in to Internet Explorer and it works. Everything works! This is the first good sign of the day. I finish payroll and I know that made me happy because that means money in the bank for me. But even through that, I had to laugh at myself. I've been talking about how good things have been lately and there always has to be bumps in the road. So, job #1 complete after job #2, but that's ok. Unfortunately, I didn't make it into town today to make my pick-up for job #1 and I didn't go by Mardel's to get my things laminated for my Sunday School class. I have friends possibly coming over tomorrow night which means tomorrow was set aside for cleaning. But, now I need to make a trip into town to do my pick-up and my laminating, so I have to switch plans for tomorrow to today. Where's my superwoman costume? I fixed the boys lunch. Does peanut butter and honey sandwiches with some chips, grapes, and a banana qualify as "fixing" lunch? I mean really, not much work involved there. I threw together a smoothie for my lunch and started picking up everything out of the floor for a quick vacuum. I vacuumed the house while the boys ate lunch and then put Eli down for a nap. Don't I feel horrible that he was awake 6 hours and I didn't spend much time with him. I feel pretty rotten. I sat down with Dylan and did a little learning time, all the while he's begging to play a board game or card game of some kind. I know the learning time is important so I insist we finish that but then he really needs to go down for a nap, also. Tonight, we're leaving him and Eli with some of our friends so he really needed that nap. Of course, now he's up for the 3rd time because "he has to go to the bathroom". He's not napping and he's not going to. He needs to wear off some energy. So, I tell him to get some shoes on and a jacket to go outside and play. I'm watching other posts on Facebook and I'm not the only one having a Monday on Friday. You know who you are?

So, I set out to find peace in the only place you really can...in God, the Bible. I started just looking up some key words and phrases. He's what I came across that made my smile, I've had plastered on my face all day, a reality. 2 Corinthians 12:9 "And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly, therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me." My day really wasn't that bad. I had a few hiccups, but if I let those little things wear on me, they could end up ruining my whole day. I can't let that happen. Ephesians 3:19 - 21 "And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fulness of God. Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us, Unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus through out all ages, world without end." He's saying God's love passes our understanding. It's beyond our comprehension. But, if we know the love of God we can be filled with him. God is able to do more than we can even think about and his power works in us, if we allow it.

I'm human. Being a Christian doesn't mean you don't have bad days. I have days that will get you down. I have frustration just like anyone else. I don't always handle it correctly. Today, I'm going to choose the right path. God loves me. My family loves me. If I get down in the dumps and let it ruin my day, I will have a negative effect on everyone else I come in contact with today. God will direct me. He says he will in Proverbs 3:5-6. So, today I choose to put a smile on, to sing funny songs and to finish my night with a bounce in my step. What will you do with your bad day?

Ironic

The old songs says, Isn't it ironic...don't you think, It's like rain on your wedding day, It's a free ride when you've already paid, It's the good advice that you just didn't take, Who would've thought... it figures. I looked up ironic in the Webster Dictionary. It means incongruity between the actual result of a sequence of events and the normal or expected result. My song would say something like, Isn't it ironic...don't you think, we haven't talked in 10 years but now we're laughing hard, you lived nearby and we had no time, now that you're gone a Chat window is all we have, Who would've thought...it figures. I have the desire to spend the next month traveling around to see all those people. I'd start with a short 1-hour drive, follow it up with a 5-hour drive or two, then on to a 9-hour drive, and maybe finish it up with a few trips overseas. A friend recently said to me, There are no mistakes made, just lessons learned. I guess that's the positive way of looking at it. Is it just my reminiscent attitude? Maybe! Do I want to be back in high school? No way. I love my life!

That Long

Has it really been that long since I left a Blog? Oh wow! I guess Facebook status updates have ruled my life and I forgot how much fun it is to write. My little boys are growing up so fast.

Dylan just turned 5 this week. That means he definitely not a baby anymore and not a toddler either. He's just a kid and a smart one at that. He hasn't been in pre-school this year. It just didn't work out. The one he was in closed down and by the time I started calling around, the others were all booked up. I know, academically, he'll be just fine in school. His only problem is being easily distracted. I'll tell him to do something and he starts to go do it and then he sees a toy or something on the floor that shouldn't be there and he takes care of that and totally forgets what he was supposed to go do. I used to think, WHY does he do that? But really, I am just like that. I'll be on my way to do a load of laundry but I'll see something out of place and I'll put it away and then I'll notice I forgot to make a phone call and then I'll remember I needed to add something to my calendar and then I'll check my e-mail while I'm there and before I know it an hour has past and I haven't started that load of laundry. Can those type things really be hereditary?

Eli is 2 1/2 and so full of character. He wakes up with the biggest smile on his face and the first thing out of his mouth is, What's for breakfast or Can you fix me some breakfast? He's a tough little booger, too. He cries over pain but not near as long as you would expect. He does, however, know just how to whine when his brother is around to get his brother in trouble or to get his brother away. He's got that one mastered. Most of the time they play together really well. Days where they create games are the funnest for me. They started playing air hockey with the base to their marble race track and they've made up their own rules which pretty much make them both winners and everybody's happy. I love that! Dylan is extremely helpful with Eli and protective when others come around even though he likes to beat up on him when nobody else is looking. Next year, when Dylan starts pre-school, it's going to be a different world around this house.

I've been on Facebook for a year and a half or so now and just came in contact with my best friend from high school. You know, the one that knows everything about you...your deepest, darkest secrets. We haven't been in contact much since about 2 years after I graduated. There have been Christmas cards and maybe a phone call or two, but this recent connection has led to lots of laughs, late night searches for old CDs or pictures. It's that feeling deep-down of finding something you've been missing for so long. It's that smile that won't go away when you're talking, even if it is just through a Chat window. It's that excitement to see if they posted something on your wall or are online at the same time as you. I love it! Facebook has been incredible in ways I did not imagine. I go to church with a lot of people but in the hustle and bustle of getting your kids to their class and teaching a class and then picking kids up and all the other stuff, you don't get a chance to talk with everyone. Sure, there are church activities, but even then we spend half the time preparing food for our kids, feeding our kids, cleaning up after our kids so if they aren't sitting at the table with you, you probably aren't talking much. So, Facebook has been our connection. I know it's crazy! I've gotten to know people better because you post things on here you wouldn't just walk up and tell someone. Sometimes it is just what's going on that day or that they are sick or kids are sick, but it's a way for us to connect like never before. I've been able to talk to friends who live overseas and I wouldn't normally call them or sit down and type a letter, but I might leave a line on their wall and they on mine letting us feel like we're still "friends", still "connected", still "communicating".

Life is so good right now. Even when I don't feel great or the kids are sick, ultimately I wouldn't change a thing about life right now. I sit here with a half-cocked smile on my face just because I'm thinking about all the fun stuff that has happened in my life in the last 6 months. Don't get me wrong! There have also been lots of frustrating things, but don't they make you a better person. Don't they make you stronger. I think they have for me. Smile!