My Visions

I know in the Bible God says, My thoughts are not your thoughts and neither are my ways, yours. Isn't that the truth. The whole time my mother-in-law was in the hospital I just could never imagine or envision or wrap my brain around the possibility that she might not come home. I kept thinking she'd be ok, everything would be ok and she'd be at Eli's birthday party with a hat on and a bald head. That was my vision, not God's. Since I couldn't imagine it as a possibility I just kept thinking it wouldn't happen. It's so weird. Just a few weeks ago we were sitting in her living room floor listening to her talk about the diagnosis and watching Jerry make phone calls to the family. Jerry kept saying, "She says she's going to beat this thing". We all thought she would. You look at statistics and you just imagine your family is going to be on the good side. They are going to be part of that % that survive. That's just how you have to think. My brain still isn't fully comprehending that she's gone. Everything is so different now.